4 Things Moms Can Do on the Difficult Days When COVID’s Making You Crazy

Do you find yourself fearful about the effect of this season on you and your family?

I was talking to my friend the other day – a mom of young kids. We were sharing some mom and marriage stories, something I’m very familiar with. I’ve raised four kids – now ages 43 – 25 – and I’ve been married almost 36 years. So I’ve had a lot of experience.

As we talked, she said to me, “Your book could be named, ‘It All Works Out in Time.’” We laughed, but I’ve been thinking about her words ever since.

The truth is, in time, things, at least many things concerning momming, do work out.

Now this doesn’t mean raising kids isn’t a mix of joyful moments, challenges, and everything in-between. It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be an intentional parent. Kids aren’t “set it and forget it.” No, they take constant time, attention, and as I said above intention. And of course, we want to be the very best moms we can be.

 But momming, like life, is a journey.

How can you know what you don’t know before you know? You can’t. The fact is, you learn to mom along the way. You learn, just like every other entrepreneur, self-starter, business-builder, CEO, through both your successes and your mistakes.

And, by the way, children are a work in progress too. Just when you think they’re established – in everything from friendships to hygiene habits to favorite foods and academics – they change the game on us. That’s because they’re alive. They’re dynamic. They too, like us, are on a journey. And just like us they meet with sweet spots and challenges along their path.

So what do we do about this momming journey? How can we do it better?

How can we build up our kids along the way when we’re feeling worn down…especially during these very difficult days of digital schooling and less breathing room when our patience might be running thin?

 Here are a few suggestions to help you navigate these challenging days.

1. Remember to breathe deeply – This is so simple but so necessary. And yes, we do forget to breathe properly. We tighten up our shoulders, our posture, our diaphragm when we’re tense. We don’t take deep cleansing breaths that slow the heartbeat, lower stress, and stabilize our blood pressure. Just breathe in to the count of 5, expanding your belly and lifting your chest, hold for 2, breathe out to the count of 5 till you’ve dropped your chest and contracted your stomach. Double points for teaching your kids to do this with you!!

2. Watch your words – We’re all spending an unusual amount of time together without a break. Everyone can be a little testy and expressing their anxiety in different ways. The best way to not react to your kids or spouse is to stop yourself from responding right away. Literally, just don’t speak for a couple of sections. A delayed reaction can stop those thoughts from leaving your mind and coming out of your mouth in words you regret. (I’m sharing a kind of funny story about this in my IGTV story.)

3. Admit when you make a mistake, then move on – If you’re like most moms I’ve been talking with, your patience is being tested right now with the pressure of an abnormal school and work rhythm. Everyone is in each other’s space more than usual. If you find you weren’t able to breathe or stop yourself from saying hurtful things you don’t mean, it’s okay. Ask for forgiveness (don’t forget your “I” statements – “I am sorry I said (fill in the blank). I was upset when the milk spilled. I know accidents happen. Will you forgive me for yelling at you?”). And determine to do better next time!

4. Remember this is but a season – We’re all sick of COVID. Most of us didn’t imagine this would go on for so long and we know COVID is not over. BUT, eventually, we really will look back on this season. Your kids will keep growing and so will you and your spouse if you take a little time to pay attention, be intentional, and do your best.

 It all works out in time…promise!

And, in the meantime, if you need some coaching to help you get through, please check out my services and fill in the Contact Form. I’d love to help you with more tips and strategies so you can be your best.

What is your greatest struggle during this season of COVID?